das just my baby daddy(mama)...

Hello all wanted to rap with yall for a sec. If yall dont know me (at least a little) then imma let u in my world for a min. I am a baby daddy and as much as that pains me to say it is what it is i cant help that. Sure i wish things were different but i realize everything happens for a reason whether u want it to or not. After a 3 yr relationship i am single again:( but i accept it now. Anyway dating has neva really been my thing i am somewhat of a novice when it comes to women(long story). Shyt i am just now understanding how yall work lol. So i have been on a couple of dates nuthing special some have kids though. I use to shun away from females with kids cuz of drama,attachment etc. I dont condone having children out of wedlock but it happens for whatever reason. I have a different opinion of it now cuz yeah i have a wonderful lil gurl and having me is a package deal no CODs lol. It is different for guys and gals with seeds(i.e. children i call them seeds cuz u cultivate them and they grow). Women with children usually have them in the household and that can be somewhat difficult when ur tryin to court a female. The woman has a lot on their plate cooking cleaning etc not to mention if the daddy wants to return. For the male the child(ren) arent usually in the household; its a part-time thing with full-time responsibilities. I know of a few whose children stay with them so it can occur. I am sure a lot of women want to be with a man without kids so they can possibly have some in the future. Yeah itz unfortunate many of the bruthas and sistahs out there have to deal with the stigma of having kids without being married. It is hard though but i now see the light. I dont like to judge ppl and if a woman has a kid then itz cool with me...as long as itz sensible. I am weary of dating a female with 5 kids from 5 different men das sayin somethin!!!!!!

Having children out of wedlock aint just for blacks either white ppl do it too itz just less ridiculed. To augment the situations many times bruthas are not taking care of the child(ren). It is sad but true. I only have one and i dont plan on having another until i am married. Regardless of my circumstance i am a good father learning to get better so before u judge and disregard a man or a woman with kid(s) consider the source and dont be myopic. Peace be unto u all...

Aid for AIDS

Yesterday was World AIDS Day. For those in the dark(turn the lights on) AIDS and HIV are two separate but compatible issues. HIV is a virus that weakens the immune system. There is currently no cure for HIV but there are cocktails of treatments that can subside symptoms. AIDS is when the body can no longer fight off infections that in a normal setting it would. HIV/AIDS have been prevalent for decades now. I remember first hearing about it during the early 80s. There are conspiracy theorist saying it is man-made(no I aint one of those conveying that). Regardless of origin it is a devastating disease that is relentless. I wont go into facts and stats about the disease u can read it on the CDC website(www.cdc.gov) but i do wanna get personal with u on the subject. First no i dont have HIV/AIDS(or any STDs for that matter) but i have witnessed ppl with the disease. At a previous job i had the delicate task of drawing blood from patients with HIV; scary to say the least cuz a mishap on my part could have led to infection. My real concern is for everyone who has the disease but specifically those in Afrika.

Afrika is the hotbed for many dangerous diseases from Ebola to HIV. HIV however is THE most debilitating disease on the continent. In South Afrika there are approximately 5.2 million(omg) ppl are infected with the disease and there are 1.4 million orphans due to HIV. The numbers are staggering. In a country already somewhat behind as far as technology, education, etc. it is crazy to see these statistics.

I have a dream not like King to see the "motherland" prosper as it should it is the birthplace of civilization!!! It is my duty to assist in the eradication of HIV/AIDS in Afrika esp. South Afrika. That is part of the reason why I am joining the Peace Corp. I dont know if I will actually go though but I will keep u posted. If I do go..watch for me! I wanna do great things here and abroad i have the "save the world" complex goin on and itz fine time for me to move my inertia(as my physics teacher used to say lol).

My challlenge to u is to become more aware and use the adage: "Each one teach one". Everyone doesnt get the opportunity to travel abroad yet there are numerous ways to help. There are still a lot of uneducated ppl here transferring the disease. If u are currently one who has HIV i will tell u I am here for u i support u in ur growth u can still have a life dont fret it ALLAH loves u none the less.

dammit boi...the jokes on u

forgive me Lord for I am about to sin...sorry folks i gotta say something about this. I am sure u have seen or heard about ya boi Sammy Sosa and his..umm new "enLIGHTENment". All i can say is "dammit boi!!!". I heard he is sayin itz just skin rejuvenation treatment and he was suprised how light he became after the fact. I dont know ppls whad do u think? Sun is whiter than his wife??!! I cant speak on the reasons behind this fiasco and i dont like to judge but like NFL Sunday Countdown segment: Com' on man!(if that went over ur head dont worry bout it). Needless to say he grown so do u but it just seems strange. It is especially strange when ur a once-professional athlete from another country marrying a white gurl. All that can seem to lead to u trying to be shay whitey and "fit in". Trust me if u doin that Sosa they still gon' call u a nigga! But itz whatever ppl do plenty of stupid shyt daily so.. idk this was just on my mind take it or leave it.

stupid is as stupid does

im back to hit u n the head with some outlandishness(is that a word?). I am talkin today about two separate incidents involving two sets of ppl with one common denominator: stupidity.

I am sure yall have at least heard about the situation where 3 TN football players have been charged with armed robbery. Yeah i echo the same sentiments: wtf?!! It baffles me how utterly stupid ppl can be. These dudes have a full ride to a prominent skool and granted TN aint all that this yr(with the exception of their QB Johnny Crompton) but come on man u gonna rob someone with a pellet gun at that. Now what would have happen if u try to rob the wrong kat and he/she put a bullet to ur dome maybe then u would think twice. It is conveyed they tried to rob a local bodega(store) near campus. WTF??!! dude i know how athletes get privileges on campus so why do u need to rob someone is it the money? nah cuz though u might not get it now there are other "perks" that more than compensate is it the thrill? negro plz yall play for a D1 skool wht kinda other thrill u need u betta rock climb or somethin.

Next is ya boi Thunder Collins(cool name by the way) he played for Nebraska a few yrs back. He got life in prison plus 110 yrs for attempted murder and armed robbery from a botched drug deal. Son was trying to rob the drug dealers and end up killin one and seriously wounding another.

I dont get it. I never played on the collegiate level but i have been an athlete all my life so i know we tend to get certain amenities. Maybe they thought they were invincible who knows. The 3 TN who are just 18 will probly get probation, kicked off the football team and skool. Both them and Thunder Collins have ruined their lives over something not even worth it. A lot of athletes tend to boast and brag how bad they are and their ego starts to cloud their judgment. It is a shame some more brothas n the shyt further makin all bruthas look bad yeah i said it it is the proverbial "all niggas act and look alike". I hate the generalization but when u continue to see the trend of stupidity from young bruthas itz hard not to just lump us all into one neat lil package sealed with a stamp of disapproval.

This is to all the bruthas out there even if u aint playin sports wisin up gods this society was build for u to fail so why would u assist in that. Also for my sistahs who got lil boyz growing up ballin or have brothas gettin older teach em the ropes so they wont fall in the trap.

are u black enuf?

At some point in ur life(if ur black) u may have been asked this question or subtly felt it in some form or another. The Great Amerikkkan society deemed u unworthy as a human being fornicating ur minds with illogical thought; a veritable mind-fuck('xuse my "french")! What is it to be black enuf anyway????I believe this clash of color within ur own race started with the field negro/house negro syndrome. That conflict has transcended today pitting light skin vs dark skin and all in between. There was a fable i read once about these brothers were always fighting so one day the dad gave each of them a pile of sticks and told them to try to break it...they could. He then have each of the one stick apiece and told them to break the stick...of course they broke. The morale of the story is together we are strong singularly however we are easily broken.

A friend told me once that she used to be ridiculed by dark skin females cuz she was light skin and pretty. She isn't into traditional "black music and culture"(another post later) so she didn't "fit" in. I know that has had an effect on her interactions with other black females and i know she has a complex with that. This is just an example of how we are systematically being enslaved; we are being brainwashed and most don't even know or care. How can u dislike someone cuz they light skin or speak articulately or like Italian music? Its ridiculous and sad at the same time. On a side note but still relevant just check ur local t.v show video or movie to see wht Amerikka defines as being "black". Shyt if u aint pimpin hoes ,dumpin on some fool(aka bussin a cap in someone's azz) or other blaxploitation roles from the early dayz u aint black enuf. And hell yeah we perpetuate these senseless images no doubt!!

Look brothas and sistahs we gotta strip our minds of this self-defeating mentality for the betterment of our culture. Think about what u do and why u do it. Are u really hatin on someone cuz deep down ur ashamed of urself? In the end it gets u nowhere and in the mean time between time u are furthering the gap in our own race and assisting the enemy Sambo!

hook line and sinker...

i just went to a wedding this wkend my boi got married. It was a lovely ceremony and i enjoyed every moment of it. i just wanted to share some pics with yall sorry none of me in the suit(maybe some other time). Anywhoo take a look at the pix soon u may be in the same situation(or not..lol). the pix are on flickr under the group name "motley picturas" it is for public viewing so all u need is a yahoo.com acct.

Morehouse undressed

I was conversing with my brother yesterday and he mentioned a policy change at Morehouse College, the prestigious all-male university is Atl. This policy reform was in regard with attire; they have banned "inappropriate" attire across campus. Offenders of this policy would not be allowed to attend classes until they adhered to the policy and recidivists would be suspended from skool. This is in large part to some kats wearing dresses etc to class.

As most know Atl is known for a large percentage of the gay population, some down low and some flaming scalding hot. I am not against homosexuality (well umm let me restate that i am not for it but you do you!) but I actually am a propenent of this new policy change. It also refers to doo-rags, baggy pants, etc( see CNN link for story: http://www.cnn.com/2009/US/10/17/college.dress.code/index.html). I think this is a paragon for change amongst blacks esp. males. To me itz just like u are at work and ur job says "look playa u have to wear a shirt and tie everyday..". I am for that cuz you are a professional and though u are more than ur clothes appearance does matter. Yeah there in skool but where does it end?? Y not start now and omit certain attire when attending classes. I shout for independence and creativity but leave that shyt at home when u not handling bizness.

I was on the outside lookin in(on the subject of dress) a while back myself. I am a rebel(stubborn rather) saying that ppl shouldnt worry about my manner of dress cuz I am who I am converse with me and find out. A friend once told me that a lot of ppl aint goin want the time to be tryin to figure me out. That is true most if not all ppl somewhat judge u on ur appearance; it is a defense mechanism in a sense. If u lookin like hotghettomess.com many are goin to avoid u entirely but if u dressin nice and look clean then that will at least get ur foot in the door when opportunity knocks(whether it be a job or convo). I'm workin on tryin to look decent most of the time even when i am goin to the store u neva know who is watching and u mite pass up a chance cuz u lookin bummy...

This story touched me cuz it is a smaller theme to a bigger picture. I am for a dress code in schools for the most part. I have a lil gurl( see older post) guess what she told me the other day "i cant wait to go back to skool to show off my new clothes.." I didnt say anything to her cuz she is just 8 right now so i let it slide..for now. But that is the mentality a lot of young kids have they wanna be so fresh and so clean when u should be worryin about ur skoolwork. Again dont get me wrong i am not overly conservative but if ur sole purpose is to look fly @ skool we got problems. For those who know me I LOVE TO SHOP(yes ladies i will give u a run for ur money) and i like to look fly all the time and though i am an older god i know ppl wanna look nice and everything but i know my responsibilities. We need to instill in the youth that it aint all about being fly...yes u should dress appropriately for the situation but not just for the sake of it. I believe if there are dress code policies in skool there would be less ridicule for students of low economic status less parading around and more focus on real things like grades, establishing relationships with students and teachers; it would have a huge effect on our young black youth today.

the circle of life

Today whas a long day not only did i have to wrk(and deal with all the politics dat go with it) but i volunteer for a local Hospice. I just started but sitting there today with my "new friend" made me visualize how fragile life really is. I volunteer in a nursing home with most patients not living beyond 6 months. It is saddening but also relieving in a way. As i conversed with my friend i scanned the area we were sitting in. They were about to serve dinner and I could see the degradation of these folks. Skin elasticity failing, memory fading etc. it is as if they reverted back to babydom; CNAs gotta feed some of them! As i scientist by trade i know bout the cycle of all life we all will possibly venture down this road i guess. I dont wanna talk too much about this right now maybe later I just want yall to soak it in ur brain right now. Rihanna said "Live ur life..." and i echo the same: live ur life to the fullest be all u wanna be and can be cuz we dont live forever.

Peace my brother

Aight kats been asking me would I post sumthin about this topic and i had to oblige. Recently President Obama received the coveted Nobel Peace Prize. There has been some debate on why he was awarded this accolade since he hasn't been in office for that long.

I am quite surprised also that Obama received the Nobel Peace Prize. I just think it is premature! It is supposed to be awarded to individuals "that the most or the best work for fraternity between nations, for the abolition or reduction of standing armies and for the holding and promotion of peace congresses" according to the Nobel's will. Now I know that Obama seemingly is trying to create peace talks with certain countries and nations and that he is essentially trying to clean up the mess that "W" made but in my opinion what tangible thing has he done to warrant this prestigious honor?

Some say it is a early vote of confidence for other countries to see that peace can prosper if we work together which is i think at the forefront of Obama's policies. For whatever reason the brutha got it and though i aint hatin' I just want to see more tangible results from the current administration before giving out cake and ice cream.

Can Black ppl be racist?

Hola señoras y señores I was thinking about a topic I was discussing yesterday and decided to let u weigh in on it: Can blacks(and non-whites for that matter) be racist? We all should know about racism in this country how it helps fashion the minds of many who are currently still in power. After centuries of degradation, riots, marches, assassinations to now seemingly equal opportunity I wonder can non-whites reverse that racism towards the once oppressors(or their next of kin)?


I have heard of reverse discrimination but neva have seen it up close and personal so i can really speak on it. I believe racism regardless of the actuator is wrong period dot....to judge and subsequently treat someone wrongly based on race(i.e skin color) is ridiculous. Racism i think was formed from whites to view themselves as superior yet we are all human. The effects of racism is everlasting however and I find it hard to see if there will ever be a world with racism issues. I dont necessarily blame all whites for this in this era it is more institutionalized racism more than anything.

Affirmative action is considered a proxy for reverse discrimination. Affirmative action in lamen's term(who is lamen anyway??) are policies that consider race, ethnicity, or gender to promote equal opportunity. I am all for it not just cuz i'm black but b/c discrimination is real. All forms of racism has caused stereotypes, under representation and the list goes on. Opponents view it as uplifting more fortunate ppl of the preferred group(i.e. upper or middle class blacks) while hindering lower class blacks(and whites). That is left to be debated but overall i think the idea is sound.

Webster's Dictionary defines racism "as a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular racial group, and that it is also the prejudice based on such a belief". We are all created from Him and He didn't make anyone "better" than another. Most if not all things are relative so it may not be the case that someone is smarter or more handsome than u esp. not due to race??!!! Please it is a ploy to hype the individual or rationalize that there are differences among certain groups not based on environment but genetic inheritance. So ask urself are u racist?

Good hair?

Good hair bad hair the saga continues. This debate has been going on for eons with both sides seemingly in a stand-still. I recently saw Oprah(last nite really..dvr'd it) with Chris Rock discussing his upcoming documentary " Good Hair".

I have to say that i was still astounded by what is transpiring specifically in the black community; the numbers are astronomical. It was conveyed that an estimated 9.5 billion dolares is spent on hair products(weave,etc). I knew it was a disease of the mind to continue to degrade ur natural beauty by using chemicals in ur hair but i didnt know it was a full-blown epidemic! I am definitely gonna watch the movie when i comes to theatres Oct 9 should be real interesting.

I,of course, am a male so it somewhat doesnt affect me as much but as a black man it bothers me that my earths are spending so much time effort and money on frivilous things. I believe ALL black women should go natural it will break the bondage from the enslavement of ur mind thinkin that u need to assimilate to a European standard of beauty. I know some black women aint thinkin this way. I was just talkin to a coworker of mine and she said u use weave cuz it is more manageable. I respectfully disagreed and engaged in a debate that challenged her to go natural. I felt that she had a defeatist attitude about goin natural sayin it would be too hard. Negroes please!! I believe if u put in the effort u will get the result period.

I love my sistahs and i love my black ppl and i hate to see us fall into the trap when the tripwire is in plain view. Perms and/or chemicals mess ur hair up and u have to continue using it so it can look "good" but really it is destroying ur hair. I think some sistahs do it for the bruthas too. Do it for urself forget him!! Bruthas stop tellin ur sistahs to look like white gurls and str8n their hair!! Enuf is enuf we need to grasp the black community and take hold of monies that could be used for the betterment of our whole.

I am seriously considering starting a natural hair salon and im a dude!!! There are barely in any where i reside and it is fine time to become a paragon for my ppl. I challenge all my sistahs to go naturale yeah it may be hard just like me tryin to stop drinking Starbucks everyday(lol) but u can make it happen. Love urself hotep(peace)!!!!!!

"u aint artsier than me"

Chillin from today's work lissening to the soothing music of iTunes and i came across one of my new faves..The Grouch (from Living Legends they are a Oakland Ca. rap group that is awesome def. check them out live or on wax). Anyway The Grouch has a song called "Artsy". It speaks of a lot of kats out there who be fakin the funk trying to be "artsy' for the image. Dont call urself green just cuz it sounds good be real with it. I cant stand ppl who follow the crowd and do things for the sake of it we call me the "zombies"; brainless who can't maintain true self. This a shot out to those who dont think for themselves get ur shyt together!!!!!!!

vacaciones necesitan mucho

Hey there boys and gurls just got back from South Beach in Mia,FL. I went there for a bachelor's party. I must say that i needed this more than you will ever know. I have been goin thru some things lately in life and this vacation was what i needed to refocus. During the trip I experienced several epiphanies which was mind-boggling to me. I interpreted it as signs and advice for the future of mi vida.

This was the first time for me in Florida and it def. wont be my last. I love Mia and Fl. in general. I dont encounter much diversity where i reside but there just on South Beach u come across a wide range of Hispanic ethincity. Being that i am a novice in Espanol it has prompted me to really immerse myself into the learning of Spanish. I am okay and it does come fluid for me but i havent really challenged myself. It is not only so i can go back to South Beach(do trust das my new haven) but around the globe it is essential to learn Spanish and itz cultura.

I just didnt realize how significant a little vacation time free of ills can do to ur holistic being. I am glad ALLAH gave me this opportunity and watched over us all. We had a wonderful time and hope to do it again soon. If u need a break trust me take it.....!

happy b-day mi hija

Yesterday whas mi hija(daughter's) birthday and it kinda hit me how time flies(and how old i am lol). Now im 23 reflexive so i am still kinda young i had my daughter when i was still a naive young man in college. This post is a tribute to her and how she has changed my life. I have been thru a lot these past yrs from love lost to life in general but the one mainstay that keeps me driven is my daughter. I was born to be wild(lol) and though i am an introvert i can get crazy and before her conception i was somewhat lost. I am stubborn and she forced me to change my wayz cuz i realized it aint about just me. I have responsibilities not just to her but to my family friend myself etc. I don't claim to be the greatest dad in the world but i really do try as all men who father children should.

On a side note I wanna rap to the bruthas who are reading this if u do or dont have child(ren). It takes two to Tango(even artificial insemination lol) seriously though esp. black men we need to stand up and take charge of the family for real it is past due time fellows. Our queens suffer enuf thru birth and having to put up with our knuckleheads. This is not a bashing of men for the applause of the earths this is a state of union address if u will a union of bruth and sistah mother and father ....family. Rize up bruthas treat our women with respect and raise ur kids(even if they aint urs)


aight back to mi hija she is 8 yrs old since yesterday and it amazes me how fast they grow. I look back on when i grew up and my parents wood say" u growin up fast.." i didnt understand it then but i do now. I wanna cherish every moment of my life a quote from Prodigy(mobb deep):"every minute is jam pack because u cant get it back..". das real to real statement said rt there. Fulfill ur destiny ppl and live ur life dont fret the small stuff.

shut ur pie-hole!!!!!!!!!!!!

This has been a hellava couple wks and it aint even Christmas time yet. I am referring specifically of the outbursts of some high-profile entities; namely Rep. Joe Wilson, Serena Williams, and ya boi Kanye West.

First off is South Carolina rep. Joe Wilson. Now I have been in a cave for while now so forgive me if I can kinda rusty on some info but have neva heard of him before the incident. I could read up on him but i don't feel like it. He of course was the man of abruptly shouted "You lie" towards Pres. Obama regarding health care. I can't really speak on the actual issue of Pres. Barack's health care reform just yet (other than itz a lot of cheese) but to call Obama a liar is ludicrous. I am all for healthy debate and u can disagree but the lack of civility is frightening simply because i don't recall anyone doin that to "W" during his tenure(all those lies HE told to the Amerikkkan public). Im not sayin it was racially-motivated but still it makes u wonder.

Round two we have Ms. Serena Williams. I was appalled when i saw her tirade. It was crazy the way she came at the line judge. The line judge was wrong pt. blank!! Instant replay shows that she made an error in judgment but das no reason to be threatened by Ms. Williams. I personally think she went ballistic cuz she was gettin her azz kicked and she reacted in anger. She should have been wondered about losing not a call she should know all calls are not gonna go ur way.

And finally Mr. Kanyeezzeee!!! I must say that he continues not to amaze me but disgust me with his arrogance. Maybe cuz he think he tight(musick that is..) or maybe cuz he got dough is it both idk. The fact of the matter is he is an azzhole...and quote me on that one. I think he knows this and feels like whatever on that issue but ppl not gonna stand for it well most won't but there are some who will look the other way but not me. I esp. am incensed with Mr. West cuz i actually love his music he is a talented brutha but personally(neva meet dude but still...) i wouldn't wanna meet him don't care for him much and kinda am ashamed sometimes to call him my brutha. He has had several tantrums i mean outburst that make u say "wtf??!!" I respect his honesty and all but there are appropriate wayz to convey ur thoughts and there are times when u just need to shut the hell up and keep it to urself.

Aint nuthin wrong with voicin ur opinion but as with all things there is a time and place. So the lessons for today is there are always consequences(good and/or bad) to ur actions whether they be verbally or otherwise and remember it aint all about U....

can a brutha get some luv?

As you may well know by now i fashion myself as an activist;a social agitator if you will. I luv to debate all things esp. politics. I was reading MSN about the resignation of a Mr Van Jones. If you don't know him he WAS the White House's environmental advisor. Unfortunately for the brutha he resigned amidst "inflammatory" comments and other "undesirable"actions. See link for synopsis(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Van_Jones#Resignation_from_administration).

Now i am neither Democrat nor Republican and i don't necessarily always pull for the bruthas and sistahs just cuz they are well...bruthas and sistahs I try to be objective as possible. But I agree to some extent to what Anthony "Van" Jones said and did. Firstly he signed a petition saying that 911 was a pretext for war; that it was somehow manipulated by the Bush Admin. 911 was crazy as hell and i wish all the families who were involved peace but hell yeah i think Bush and them had something to do with it. The whole shyt got holes than Swiss cheese. Bush,Condo,Cheney all of em lied and used their political tango(conversation dancing) to dupe the American ppl into believing whatever they said and plus to re-elect "W"(???) again. Secondly he made a vulgar comment about Republicans at a conference. Read the link above for details but i mean granted he probly should have used better judgment "Ye who is w/o sin throw the 1st stone". The man was telln it like it is in his opinion of course. Yeah i think a lot of Republicans are out for the rich and disregard the poor but i aint feelin the Dems either so...das what he thought and he said it but damn do u have to make him resign over that.

This for all you haters out there loathin the new Administration. We are all human we all make mistakes and Obama is doin a hell of a job considering he is basically the custodian that has to clean the shyt that was 8 yrs from ya boi that U voted for. Van Jones seems like a reasonable good dude has some good credentials so give the brutha some luv will ya?

wtf??

Hello all yeah im up early to give u this shocking news! Well actually itz more of the same shyt really my dad sent me this email and to be honest i am not really that upset about it. It is pertaining to a doll that was in Costco. This couple went in there with their daughter and found this doll. Of course the couple was Black and they went to HR in the store and it was subsequently pulled. I say "of course" not to be a smart aleck but if the couple was any other ethnicity i don't think anything would have happened(maybe? what do u think?). Now I have some opinions on this esp. since the New York Times incident with Obama and the monkey cartoon.

Okay I'm a scientist by trade so the whole evolutionary idea is real to me but I don't necessarily believe we evolved from monkeys(all humans not just Blacks). I know the whole "porch monkey" rhetoric is formed by idiotic individuals so anything associating Blacks and monkeys causing an uproar. Nah it aint right and sometimes it is hard to tell if it is racial or not nowadays everything is so subtle. I think sometimes we(Blacks) think everything is racist and fail to realize that we may be oversensitive(and rightly so i guess but think before u act).

In this incident I don't really think it was racial but knowing the history of Amerikkka it is unwise to manufacture such things that could cause social unrest. The manager of the store should have been prudent enough not to allow that to be placed on the shelves. Itz unfortunate we are in the state of mania where everything is scrutinized and prodded from Ms. O's hair to black dolls but that is the wonderful hypocritical continent called North America.

my life feels like an empty stomach

today at work i got an email pertaining to a team-building function that will take place in the near future. The email asked a question of what obscure interesting fact could i share with my coworkers. I thought long and hard(well ....kinda) on this and I really couldn't think of anything interesting about myself. I realize that that is sad in my opinion because I feel I have so much potential to be great. My life as like most have been filled with success and failure yet i still think i could have done more in my youth. I know my strengths and weaknesses. I am writing to you now because i know many have felt the same way i do; that we could have made our lives more interesting, more fulfilling. There are so many things on this Earth to partake in and u only have one life to live so live it up. I know the topic is debatable cuz the term interesting is soooo subjective but it is whatever u think though in the end that counts. I cant dwell on the past but use it as motivation for the future. Ask urself what can i do to enrich my life to make it more fulfilling?? And do it.....!

can u feel it-hip hop is here to stay

whas lookin on youtube and found this video from wayyyyyyyyyyyy back. Now I aint that old but i get my grown man on. It just made me think of how hip-hop was so pure;pure as in not tainted by money hungry funny dummies lunchin from the munchies cuz they high off the green they smoke. yeah i rhyme perfectin my craft(check out other blog: poeticjustus). I love hip-hop it is my first love besides soccer yeah i said soccer what?(lol). I lissen to the garbage on the radio now to gauge how off we are as far as the genre. I am tired of ppl dissin the musik and thinking itz dead im the necromancer here to resurrect it. i personally am on a mission to make sure REAL hip-hop is forever coming through ur speakers negating the wackness that is actually a lackness of skillz....peace this is the sungod

oldies and still goodies pt. 1

just came across this song by the one and only Smokey Robinson. Wanted to share it cuz itz one of my all time favs imma rap to yall later about some things on my mind regarding ole skool musik but til then sit back relax and love baby.....

soul food: gift and a curse

itz about 7pm in the evening on a Sunday. For the most ppl ur bellys are now full and ur waiting to exhale(loosen ur belt and breathe) from partaking in some good ol' soul food. Now you don't necessarily have to be black to consume soul food but i think it would be hard for non-blacks to concoct such traditional recipes without some intervention from a sistah or brutha. I'm no history major but i do know that 90% of blacks originated from the south back in the dayz thus i can safely assume that soul food also came from the south(souf).

Soul food is a cornucopia of ingredients, spices, and a little innovation to say the least. Soul food has been a stable for black family for generations. It builds comadarie; for families to grow together. The food a lot of time consists of ham, bread, greens, pork, chicken and other less than healthy grub. My concern is the ever-increasing obesity level in Amerikkka esp. black ppl and more specifically my sistahs.

I aint saying soul food as a lot to do with it cuz there are many factors that are subjective like diet, exercise, attitude, etc. but it definitely perpetuates it. The reason I am saying this is because we as blacks need to step our game up. We need to be more health-conscience;shedding the old traditional means of cooking or seasoning. You can still eat fried chicken but you don't have to cooking it in lard use canola oil or something less fattening.

Soul food is wonderful and a mainstay in black culture but the time to change is now! Concentrate on curtailing some items on the menu by using healthier alternatives. Black ppl already got health issues like hypertension and FEMA so why augment the problem when u can help diminish it?

so-called friends

In this dot.com world the true meaning of friends is skewed. No longer do you have to really engage with someone you just pt and click then viola!. With the advent of Myspace, Facebook and even Blogspot you automatically gain an audience; a plethora of "friends" at your disposal. But I cant blame it all on technology it still is up the individual to discern real from fake.

What is a friend? A friend is an individual that you confide all of your personal ideas, interest, virtues and vice to. He or she is someone you can trust,who doesn't lie to u, who got ur back in tough times. A true friend is someone who doesn't judge you or are with ulterior motives. A friend is more than someone u just know from around the way. I am also guilty of this but we tend to use the word"friend" kinda in the way we choose to use the word "love" it becomes to general all-encompassing to varied situations or people.

Now let me get u str8 on this: there is a thin line u walk when dealing with friends of the opposite sex. I don't care how cool yall are, have been since childhood whatever shyt change partna. I am weary of boys and girls being just friend not saying they cant but u need to tread lightly. It is esp. awkward when one likes the other but the other doesn't ...so how can u still be "friends"? All situations and ppl are different but realize what actions u partake cuz u don't wanna send the wrong signals and end up in some drama.

Friends..how many of us have them? I was told you only have few true friends in life and u should pick ur friends like u pick ur fruit. Both statements are wise in that we all need a support group albeit ur fam or friends life is tough and no one is an island. So before you go off and say "dis is my friend" ask urself is it REALLY? Aint nuthin wrong wit having acquaintances or associates either but having friends is essential to life on this Earth.

how i love thee

"love is love love"so says Wu-tang clan. Love is a complex thing that sometimes bedazzles me to no end. What is love really? is it that feeling of bliss when u are with a special someone? Or maybe that deep emotional connection(the "one"-see previous post on this topic)? I am no expert on love or even relationships for that matter; shyt I'm havin a hard time trying to keep mine intact. We have all been in love or at least we thought we have been. I tend to object to the fantasy idea of loving someone intensely then that sustains forever. Love comes and goes; there are variations or stages if you will. Don't get me wrong some may find someone they love deeply and that last forever but to me realness sets in sooner rather than later. Ppl have too many expectations on love i think. Love flows like the Nile River it brings life to two people and the relationship. However it takes more than love to keep a relationship.

Here is my take on love. U first meet a nice-looking male/female. There is an attraction(physically) then u talk to them get to know them. Do you love me? I doubt it. Yes you both may have things in common but you continue to court and get to know the person and eventually(not always) u create a bond. this is the infatuation stage of love. You wanna spend time with this person continue to know them nurture ur bond. Next yall become a couple. Now at this point it can be a little tricky it depends on how u play it. Love can continue to grow but it goes beyond the "head over peds" phase. You see the faults in ur significant other. he doesn't fold the clothes or she picks her feet in the bed. But really this aren't faults they are just the quirky things ppl do just cuz u don't do it doesn't mean itz wrong. Anyway the connection is plugged into the socket now and u have real love like Mary J said. All of this is tentative because itz contingent on the two ppl to be committed. If ur not then u may stray or not invest energy to sustain the relationship. As most know relationship are a 9-5 plus OT baby so again it take more than love to withstand a lot of jealousy,insecurities, communication breakdowns, etc that WILL come.

I asked my father once was he in love with his wife(my step mom) he promptly said "no". I was taken aback for a sec. but he explained that i goes beyond being in love he deeply loves his wife. being in love i think is a term that can be subjective and interchangeable. I think for him it meant the same thing kinda. He is in love with his wife because they have real love in their household. Nah the infatuation stage been over( his been married to her for over 20 yrs now) and they have been through a lot as any long-term couple should and would. Love is what u make it kinda like life. There are changes but if you truly love someone deeply then no one(or thing) can penetrate ur bond.


What you do is crazy babe
Not like you belong in an asylum
Crazy babe,
Like the sun in the morning
And the moon at night
Like the rain falling from the sky
Like the trees growing from the ground
I'm astounded babe
By your love for me
And your touching me
And your trust in me
Like you do whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo-Jill Scott "Not like Crazy"

colored people time

we all know what this term is if you dont u betta ask somebody. Whas conversin with my homie she said that she went to a baby shower and it was 3 hrs behind schedule. I automatically asked her if they were black; it was a reflex of the tongue i guess. Anyway why is it commonplace now that black ppl are deemed not punctual, late or otherwise never on time?

I can't really place my metacarpal on it but the now infamous "CP time" echoes throughout society. What baffles me is that we as Blacks seem to be okay with it. As much technology that is at the palm of ur hands(literally) u should never really be late. I understand shyt happens that are beyond ur control but really u need to be on time for any event. I personally cannot stand to be late. Damn son CPT is on Wikipedia ridiculous!

The fact remains we as Blacks need to have more responsibility for ourselves and not settle. Program ur blackberry,palm,etc and be on time for any event that u have already committed to. Stop the madness; no more "CP Time"!

angels and demons

Watched the movie"Angels and Demons" last nite(late last nite). It was totally awesome!! Ron Howard did a great job directing the movie everybody was great. I wont tell you much about it cuz i don't wanna spoil it. It got me to thinking about religion again. It is a very controversial topic however one that should be discussed nonetheless. The movie involves Catholicism. I don't profess I know anything about the religion outside of a few rituals and they worship a guy called the Pope.

I used to be befuddled when i use to hear ppl worship a human being. I have come to understand(try to) that the Pope is as significant as a pastor or clergyman; he is a man of the cloth. The movie incited a lot of burning desire to broaden my knowledge of religion maybe b/c i don't adhere to just one. Should I even? The Pope obviously is very influential and u know what it doesn't matter if i think he is just a man; he is a man with a purpose. The Pope i feel uplifts ppl of that faith and directs them on a path of righteousness.

I am paraphrasing an actor in the movie: Religion is man made and man is not perfect. I guess u have to realize nothing is perfect in this world esp. religion. Worship whatever u like if it can help u become a better person so be it.

Ownership

I was looking at my fingernails and tried to remember the last time I got a manicure. Hmmm...itz been a minute but it prompted me to pose this question: Where are the black-owned businesses? I am sure there are a few but they are definitely far b/w. For example I have yet to find a black nail shop itz always Asian. Shyt even in the "hood" near me there is an Asian-owed hair shop. What the hell Asian ppl know about Black ppl hair??!! Kudos to them though cuz they know what sells in the "hood":weave,perms, urban wear and alcohol.

Really folks this is serious. I am not talkin about where u have blacks working at an urban clothing store owned by Arab-Americans or a few black women at the Asian-owned hair store. I mean "legitimate" Black-owned entrepreneurs who see the value of bizness and have real concerns about the needs of Blacks in underserved communities. Instead of a ABC store have a health food bodega or a clothing shop that doesn't have "im so hood" T-shirts.

I can empathize with the mindstate of denizens of impoverished areas. The ability to desire change is not there. We have to demand for more and not fall back in the presence of opposition. We need more black businesses that are there to really help not hinder the community. Really why is there a liquor store on every corner in the "hood"? Cuz we allow it. Economics 101 is supply and demand. Whomever supplies the product because ppl want(demand) for it. Let's break the mold and take control of our situation.

churrrrch.........pt 1

Mi hija and I went to church this morning. This is the first I have been in 6 months. It is a Baptist church located near my house which is very convenient for me. I have been under a lot of stress lately from life and i felt like i need some spiritual guidance. I am unsure of my religion if u will. I say that i am spiritual but my background(like most Blacks) is Christianity more specifically Baptist. i grew up goin to church with my parents. As most kids u do as ur told so i was fed a heaping pot of Jesus every Sunday. Growing up and goin to college i didn't really go to church like dat maybe sparingly. I have always been skeptical about religion probly because a lot of it isn't pure it seems tainted by man and all his machinations.

I like church though and i do believe in Jesus Christ. I dont really read the Bible much but i know a little. I know i should probly read more to gain clarity. Well today the pastor was talkn about "ur harvest". Basically saying that there will be things goin on in ur life and itz not for u to understand and think itz about u itz for u to handle it properly and God will c u through all the drama. I love to hear the message on Sundays it provide me with the armor that shields me from harmful day-to-day things that could level any human. I do believe that there is a higher power and without Him u are truly lost.

I try to be different and learn various religions and become an eclectic to understand more than just one religion. A lot of Christians believe that if u dont believe n their religion u goin to Hell..i beg to differ. My God doesn't dicotomize religions and picks the "best". "aint no best north south to east west(Nas)"! I think if u live ur life righteously then u good now how u go about doin that is left to be considered as long as u are monotheistic ur good wit me.

Religion is a hard topic to dissect and really it is very debatable. My thing is i try to get to the essence of it all without all the fat to gnaw through(chicken anyone??). Spiritual is what i call myself for the moment things may change we grow everyday. ALLAH U AKBAR(God is the Greatest)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

stop snitchin...??

I heard this one guy tell me one day that snitches get stitches. There has been a ideology circulating around urbanites that if you inform the authorities of a crime or potential illegal activity then ur a snitch. The consequences of this act can be detrimental to ur health(i.e. u would more than likely be killed). This has caused fear in the "hood" and sometimes surrounding surbibia. It is a casading effect ppl dont voice out their concerns of crimes for fear of losing life thus it perpetuates or at least fails in itz attempt to curtail licentious acts.

It has been ingrained in our society for years not just in the "hood". Growing up I was always told not to tattle-tell(snitch) when something I would consider wrong. That mentality has now been played out in the arena of adulthood. Dude ppl are merchandising "stop snitching" T-shirts!!!

Being around the projects most of my life I have seen my share of crime but I learned at an early age the code of the streets. One of those so-called codes is not to snitch. This has lead me to develop a nonchalant attitude towards violence as a whole. I cringe when it occurs but I see it as not my place to get caught up in things that doesn't concern me. I know this is contradictory in a sense because my community should concern me and everyone else. It has been years of conditioning that has lead me to this state of mind. I guess the question is would u call the proper authorities if you witnessed a crime? I extricate myself from situations like that by trying to come at it from another angle like education or prevention rather than intervention if you will. It is a tough decision to make.

musik

I am sure you have heard the adage "music soothes the savage beast" before. Music is a language that has no barriers; no translation is necessary(unless ur reading the notes-music theory). Like most I have been fascinated how curative music is to the soul. It is a panacea for many ailments and is also known to affect mood. Even plants are supposedly affected by these magical notes. There are a plethora of genres to choose from but really even if you don't relate to the lyrics you can definitely be attuned with the instrumental itself. Music connects all ppl transcending culture, race, differences.

I have recently been learning to play the guitar which i bought a while back. Needless to say i have had much luck but it is fun to teach myself. I have also will be taking some lessons from a local music shop so should be real fun. I grew up playing the saxophone. My ppls swear that i would have been a great jazz musician if i just stuck with it...maybe so. I love music and all the emotions that encompass it it fills my life with energy and passion.

Music whether u like hip-hop or jazz is an art form that should be cherished always. It can hype you up or bring u to tears what other thing is that powerful to influence ur emotions like that? Some may say love and while that may be true music doesn't hurt so love the music yall.

what u dont know can hurt you

whaddup fam "and another one" for ya. Have you ever had burning questions that sear through the flesh of ur brain only to go unanswered? I think we all have at some pt but ask urself do u really wanna know? what is the point of ur ? being answered will u find solace in knowing the truth or that the person didnt tell a lie. I guess many things are meant to be unanswered because things could be worse off. I find it my policy to try to be honest i aint goin to say i am always but i really do try cuz i want that in return. Really the title speaks for itself there are a lot of times when we fashion crazy things in our heads that simply arent true. It is more of the curiosity than anything that pains us and while it doesnt hurt to ask what u dont know can hurt u potentially. Stress can lead to physical and mental ailements. My remedy is if it really isnt that serious let it go and dont worry about it. There are umpteen million other things to concern urself with than whatever is troubling ur neurons at the moment. All darkness come to light and the answer will reveal itself in due time without ur prodding.

dazed and confused.

Y is love sooo hard? one minute ur on cloud 90 then next ur wondering if he/she is the "one". I am goin through relationship problems with a gurl that i am totally in love with. Not to get too personal but love make u do crazy shyt for real. I am experiencing it firsthand. I have NEVER felt this way about any gurl before. I know i am n love with her. I realize that sometimes to come together it is good to be apart. It sux but i have learned a lot about myself and our relationship.


Now i know what jordin sparks and chris brown meant with the song "no Air"; it is hard to fxn normally without this gurl in my life. That is real sad cuz i should stand on my own two. I depended so much from her with regards to happiness and peace that it drew energy from the relationship; the spark needed for her to reciprocate emotional connection back. I am using myself as an example because i know many go thru these things. two ppl don't make a whole it is that two ppl make a third(1+1=3) the third being the relationship. Relationships require two individuals that are dependent only of themselves to come together and build a relationship as a unit. Both need not be needy of the other cuz that causing strife and loss of vitality in the relationship. U don't put expectations in humans they will only let u down put them in the Creator. As humans we must understand that we all have issues and we make mistakes but if u want to be with someone u take their flaws and virtues together;itz a package deal. Being this is Independence Day there is a reason to be free for urself; to make a stand to be whole by urself.

Love hurts like a muther but at least i know i can feel. I dont know the outcome of my situation ..yeah i wanna be with her forever she is my first real love will we?? i don't know. I just know that i have learned a lot in this process and it has made me more mature. "I aint mad baby it made me stronger made me get my paper longer". So for those out there that are lovesick there is a cure : learn from the relationship and want went wrong from all angles (u ,him/her,etc.) and REALLY make a change for the better not so much for u to be with ur love again(hopefully) but to become a better person whether it is with him/her or someone else.....hotep(peace)

much better off (the one)

In this world we met all types of ppl. Some think everything happens for a reason and some are here in a person's life for a season. Me.? well i do believe things happen for whatever reason:chance or fate. Love is a funny thing however. My parents married had babies(me and my brother)and then got divorced soon after. Does it mean that they were the one for each other. I guess at that moment. I don't know if I believe in a ONE. Yeah u can love someone a whole lot and neva be together forever(forever ever??). I have found someone i can share my life with and be happy(she just don't know it yet) but does that make her the one? The "one" is not necessarily who u marry i don't think. There are many who are attuned with ur feelings and understand u but u don't really have to marry them and all that. In my opinion the "one" is who u make it to be and destiny and ur efforts will make it come to fruition. "ur love is ummm ummm goood goood ummm ummm goood for meeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!! much better off".... letting things happen don't worry if he/she is the one.

No more Mr. Nice Guy part 1

"Nice guys finish last with their special set of rules". Jay-Z poignantly conveyed in his rhymes that nice guys always seem to the most undesirable. I am currently reading this book"No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Dr. Robert Glover. I have only read a few chapter(thus the part 1 of this blog) but I have already begun introspecting my life as a whole and visualizing the contents of the book as it relates to me(in lamens terms: I'm feelin it so far!!).

Now let me somewhat define what Dr. Glover means by a nice guy. A nice guy is one who always wants to please others in spite of himself. This is a wonderful altruistic trait but one cannot love others if he doesn't love himself. A lot of women nowadays want a lil drama in there lives; so action that negates what the nice guy offers in a relationship. There is nothing wrong with being nice but u gotta draw limits. U cant let ppl take u for granted or abuse ur kindness. In reality the nice guy is really not so nice he appears to be but he got hella problems.

Yes ladies I am one of the nice guys. I have always been a good guy with a pinch of thug in me but hey.....I don't treat women wrong and i have been raised to be respectful. I got problems which are currently under construction;he who is without sin throw the first stone ya dig. For a long time I couldn't find a gurl that would like me for being nice but it seemed when i was a lil rough around the edges gurls flock. I aint a playa and i don't mess around a lot either but i don't understand women that like to be disrespected and treated like object. Nice guys are deemed as not having confidence and not able to "man up". This is a gross misconception but one all to real in the minds of women. All women deserve to be treated like the queens they are and the King(me) can provide. I know women want to be cherished and secure but does a bad boy have to be the one who can do dat for u??? The nice guy syndrome is an interesting concept that is still in me thus the reason for me reading the book. I am trying to get what i want and need in life by not being so "nice".

Part two is coming up once i finish this book but feel free to discuss what i said above.

madoff to jail...dont drop the soap

hello all i am sure yall have heard about Bernie Madoff's sentencing: 150 yrs in prison. Let me first start off by saying DAMNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!! Dat is a helluva long time esp. since he is already 71 yrs of age. I am curious to know how long of the sentence he actually must serve. If it is 25 before parole y give him so much time. I think the judges should consider the age of the convict in addition to the crime. i mean really sun will probly be dead in 10 yrs so whas the pt?


Bernie Madoff was a financial manager that swindled millions of dollars from investors for his own gain; an estimated 65 billion dollars. Dude got a 7 million dollar APT(wtf!!??) where his wife currently lives. She claims she was unaware of the scandal but i don't wanna hear dat. When ur hubby says "hey babe let us buy this 2.2 million dollar boat..." u kinda gotta be like " uhh where u gettin all this cheese from?". Yeah he on Wall St. but they don't make bank like dat(do they??). The court has ordered to strip him of damn near all of his assets plus he still has to pay for victim claims against him. Ohh by the way his own sons turned him in if i recall. Dang fam where the love at?

Amidst this "recession" we are currently in it is a shame that we have hooligans and charlatans hustling our hard earned money away for personal gain. That is why i believe there should be no homeless ppl in Amerikkka it is too much money here. Well you reap what u sow so u better not drop the soap Madoff.

first impression means a lot but dont judge a book by itz cover either...(the realm of appearances)

whaddup my fellow citizens dis ya boi back for another intriguing round for discussion. Let's rap back appearances. Appearances made of a lot of things from jewelry to hairstyles, tattoos to the clothes on ur back(and other body parts lol). There are tons of trendsetters and followers of styles for that matter. So who sets the norm for proper appearance. Of course this is predicated on the situation i mean u don't wanna go to an interview with a Jordan jumpsuit on right?

I have always been against judging someone based on their appearance. I know it is probly a innate defense mechanism in humans. If you see a person cloaked out with something bulging in his pants walkin in the bank he might not be makin a deposit(get ur mind out the gutter lol-i was there too for a sec.). But really i kinda feel like a lot of people are misjudged by how they look. Styles are styles and to me as long as it is appropriate and fits the scenario then whas the deal.

I am tatted up aight and hell yeah i want more but most of my tatts are in areas where they are hardly seen. No doubt if u look hard enuff they are still visible but it is harder since i am dark-skinned. Me and the fam were having a debate about tattoos and their relevance in our world. My dad seems to think that there are limits to how many and wear they should be placed. I aint tryin to be on the face tatted but shyt im thinkn of gettin one on my back and my chest. My dad says they are a fad and they will fade i respectfully disagree. Unlike clothing or hairstyles i just think tatts are more artistic in a sense(maybe cuz they are pictorial i guess). Art neva fades it just transforms.

Mida i say do u ...but also do understand that there are social norms in place that somewhat stymies expression. There may be subtle if not blatant consequences to ur actions so be prepared. Don't assume and judge do some prying into the person beforehand. I know this may not be feasible for everyone but hey give ppl a chance in life. I am all about individual expression and conveying how u feel openly as long as u do it with class. Maybe i am just stubborn and i hate to conform to norms but who sets the rules anyway?

the real "king"

As many have already heard...the king of pop is deceased. Michael Jackson has died from cardiac arrest at his home in Cali. Let us dissect Mr Jackson for a moment. He is arguably the most iconic figure ever known a son of a steelwrker Michael from day one been in the spotlight. I remember the Jackson 5 cartoons that used to come on sat. mornings. Awesome! Of course you know Janet Jackson, his sister that is highly talented but really all his siblings in many variations have been talented. Michael's biggest success was from the album Thriller. Crazy video at that time and an even more wonderful album. I reminsnce from back in the dayz with "I'm Bad" and "Man in the Mirror"(ohh yeahh!!!!!). He was simply amazing.

Over the years Michael Jackson stopped making songs and went AWOL in a sense. He married a white gurl(nuthin wrong wit dat but it was the other "king"'s daughter) then wit the baby dangling over the balcony incident and all the molestation allegations it was pandemonium. Michael was an eccentric character to say the least. He was just different and aint nuthin wrong with that. I was more concerned with his health. Dude looked emaciated like Skeletor(He-Man reference)!!!!! I don't know what was goin on and maybe he didn't care but i was shocked when he bleached his skin(he didn't have a skin disorder i don't believe dat) and he was gettin frail by the moment. Personally i think he needed a sistah in his life to change him but das my opinion.

All in all Michael Jackson was the best and will always be remembered for the good and the bad..."whose bad.." U are Micheal u were.

"I DO"....(wanna spend my life savings for one day)

"Love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage". What "ole blue eyes"(Frank Sinatra for those who don't know) should've added said was that weddings make ur pockets leaner than a bulimic on crack!! Many people fall in love and get married and wanna have a beautiful wedding. Some dream of white doves and white princess dresses and tiaras etc. all their lives. I am sure that would be wonderful. There is a little issue though be ready to pull out ur checkbooks and/or go into debt.

The wedding industry is big bizness these dayz. From David's Bridal to Bridezilla (yeah i watch it so what..) there are tons of ideas,websites(offbeat bride is really cool!) to choose if you wanna go that route. No I am not married but it would be nice to be with someone forever and to cherish and raise a family. Unfortunately I am not Bill Gates and I have yet to win the lottery so financially speaking weddings scare me a lil.

I was a groomsman for my mans last yr in his wedding. It was lovely kid. There was a freakin quartet which was awesome. The reception was lovely(they had an open bar all nite..."sippin on some sizzzurrppp" lol). I don't know how much they paid but I estimate around 25k. They got paper but right now they are staying in an apt(?). Don't get me wrong love is love but in my opinion i wanna house 1st then we can see whassup with a wedding. I am sure it is in the near future and i am not knockin their choices. U do want u do but ME nah das a lot of $ for a day and their is no tangible returns. If you have the money and you're not gonna go into debt that maybe itz cool but still even then pay bills, buy a house, plan a lavish trip. I know most ppl don't have that kinda dough and their parents pay for it. I heard about one couple in TN that spend buukuu money on their wedding(their parents did) now they are divorced and their parents went broke due to the expenditures of the lavish ceremony. I aint sayin u should go think about a possibility of it not working out but das real sad.

It is up to the individual(s) to decide what their priorities are and figure out the best course of action. I just want ppl to understand you don't need to spend "X" amount of dollars to be happy. Go off to the beach just u and him or plan a real small wedding. Simplicity is sometimes the best.

good black man at your service

I was IMing(cant believe this is a verb) a friend of mine on Facebook today and her status line read:I need a little testosterone in my life. I replied that this by saying "take ur pick there are plenty of good men out here?". I included myself in this statement not as an invitation for her(she is strictly my homie) but I am a good man. I am a currently single handsome black man with an education. I know about the statistics of young black men and the state of their affairs. It is a damn shame but don't clump me in that category. Where all the good women at?! When a good man treats you well then u don;t reciprocate so how u gonna find a good man when u aint no good urself ...think about it.

We as black men are,have been and always will be public enemy numero uno in this white man's world period. Unfortunately due to systematic destruction of our own doing and by the influence of the powers that be( shay whitey or ofays as i like to call 'em) have combined to obliterate the black man in every shape, form and fashion. From incarceration to uneducation to drug dealing to pimping we have withered to a select few that "have made it". And really have we REALLY MADE IT? nah brothas and sistahs we trying to survive in a soceity that doesnt want us and deems us inadequate.

I come from a middle class family my parents divorced when i was real young and i was...well kinda raised myself. I didn't have a lot of parenting in the household but dont wanna get too personal. It was me and my twin brother and we managed with some guidance from my mother and father. I say this because I wasn't indigent and i was a reasonably good student in skool. But i still had major issues growing up so i didn't need to be from the ghetto to struggle. To make a long story short i went to college and graduated with a two B.S. degrees now working and making a decent living. Most would say that I made it or that i am a good man. But what makes a good man?

A good man is a good human being regardless of color. Yet also in a since when referring to black men there seems to be some requirements. Education is key and it doesn't matter what ethnicity you are but also i think most women would say a "nicca wit a job" is a must. Yeah income coming in is crucial especially in this "recession" but damn can a dude working at Wendy's get some love?? I believe a good black man is someone who makes u happy and is righteous. Yeah everyone falters and some may have a little thug in them but overall is he pious, good-natured aka a good black man. That is for you to decide. Remember though shyt aint always biscuits and gravy and just b/c u are goin thru some thangs dont mean he aint no good. Have you checked urself lately? Aight then nuf said!!

So ladies before you go off and say"where all the good black men at?" You may be talking to one and you haven't took the time to explore.

(note: this is not me in the pic above...i am better looking lol)

warring about peace corp

I am constantly pondering over this topic for a while now. I am considering joining the Peace Corps. My aspirations are to get into Physician Asst. skool at Duke. But in conjunction with the GRE i need clinical hours(hands-on patient experience). The Peace Corp would definitely help me out in that regard. I also feel like traveling abroad will enlighten and mature me.

The Peace Corp is a volunteer service first established by John F. Kennedy on March 1, 1961. It is intended to send American volunteers to various places on earth to work with skools and government in areas of health, agriculture, business,etc.

My dilemma is that it requires a 2yr service abroad. Not to mention the fact that I probably wont be able to get back to the states until at least a yr so that means it would be very tedious to communicate(well i know i could write but may not be physically present). Now if you been following my blog(if not then y not) u know i have a lil gurl around 8 yrs old. I am also in love with someone("chica") although we are not a couple at the moment. I don't want to leave neither of them and plus I would be leaving family and friends. On the one hand it would be an experience of a lifetime to travel to say the motherland(Afrika for non-blacks). I am a huge proponent of volunteerism yet it is different when u travel abroad. I feel volunteering in Amerikkka is less impactful than say helping children in Kenya to get basic health care and education. I know there are unfortunate people here in Amerikkka but in other countries there are people suffering due to politics or wars,etc. Yet on the other hand there are people here that I am extremely close to and i don't want to leave. Definitely not my daughter cuz she needs her father. My ex-girlfriend is a different situation we are in a hiatus right now it is complex(as all relationships) but i am in love with her but i don't know if we will get back together. Does that mean I should not wait and see or pursue my dreams and if it is meant to be it is meant to be? I am confused...but right now i am volunteer at Duke Hospice so that goes towards my clinical hours as well as satisfying my need for altruism.

I dont know what is goin to happen I tend to go with the flow(but not a follower by no means). We shall see.....

slave to the name

This is an interesting topic that i myself find hard to figure out. What is being black? What is being white for that matter? Well since i am afrikan-in-amerikkkan (lol) i cant speak on the latter. Race is a social construct fabricated in Amerikkka for the sake of classification. I am no anthropologist but i dont recall any history class any other time or place besides Amerikkka where race was coined.

With regards to people of color we come from various ethnicities that it is hard to categorize into one thing(although many try). When we say "black people" what do we refer to? Is it the skin color or ethnicity? In Amerikkka the term "black" , "white" often refers to skin color in conjunction with culture. It is a falsity however because we have different backgrounds and the culture itself is tedious to define. I believe race is constructed to validate slavery and has yet to be properly addressed in this society.

I dislike using the term "black" when describing "my people" but what else do I use? Even "afrikan-amerikan" seems skewed when labeling a certain group of people. We come from all over the globe but i guess "afrikan-amerikkkan" closely relates to our people when defining us. Help me out here people it is a deep subject that needs to be explored and questioned thoroughly. Maybe it aint that serious to u BUT IT SHOULD BE....yo check out this article about race:http://www.westernstatescenter.org/resource/ScreenDRHistory.pdf

good grief

This past wkend I completed a long overdue training session to become a Duke Hospice volunteer. I am proud to say that I will be a part of a wonderful system built on exemplary standards. In one session we were discussing grief. As you know in a Hospice patients are not treated with curative measure; you go there to live the rest of ur days comfortably. Grief is an essential resultant of any loss. Loss happens all the time and u shall grieve but it is not a bad thing if u do it positively(don't smoke weed cuz ur dog died...).

Grieving is good for many reasons. It is part of the healing process and needed to get past whatever ur grieving over. I say embrace the grief in its entirety. Yes it hurts but to move forward u need to heal ur pain and angst. If you lose a love don't run and become a recluse grieve(cry, remember,etc) and move forward. Grieving doesn't mean that you are weak or that you cant get over say loved one(or two). Humans are emotional beings so emoting feelings of grief when situations arises that trigger that is natural progression of cause and effect. So grieve my friends it is good for you.

Boondocks...a breath of fresh air for black people

Boondocks is a cartoon created by Aaron McGruder. It is a social satire of American culture and black people in general. I am sure most of my readers have at least heard about the show. If not check it out on adult swim @ Cartoon Network.

I absolutely love the shows. It is funny as hell and it has a message. I hope Mr. McGruder continues to put more shows out in the future. I know that some people dont like to show for whatever reason. I've heard some don't like it cuz it uses the word "nigga" a lot. But damn people I bet most of u use it daily so don't gimme that mess. I feel the show conveys what I feel about black pop culture and Amerikkkan culture. I want to congratulate all who have a part in making the show what it is today-a masterpiece of social importance.

It is hard to talk about social issues today especially black people issue cuz everything is so tactful. Yes you should be but damn if the shoe fit..buy it lol. nah but seriously Boondocks tell it like it is; shyt the truth hurts. It is not like it is totally inaccurate with some of the things they talk about(see below):

What is success? (part one)

Whaddup family. Let's talk about success baby(singing salt and pepper melody) let us talk about all the good thing that may be let talk about success. What is success to you ladies and gentlemen? Is it materialism; how much paper u got or the whips u push? Or is it the job u finally obtained after years in skool? I guess it depends but success is synonymous with achievement of some goal that an individual has. I was reading a fellow bloggers(acting white-see bloggers I follow) umm well blog and it prompted me to write bout specifically our black youth(if ur non-black and reading this youth regardless of color are our future).

The blogger was talking about how many youths that he/she encountered where basically stuck. They felt like they had no future after high school. There are a few that go to college but overall many do. In this century in my opinion college is not an option it is a requirement. I have a lil gurl and i drill her on the advantages of education. Being a college graduate myself i understand the need for a college education and shyt now that aint even good enuff.

There are numerous reasons we can throw around about y black youth are not getting it. Success occurs at various points in my opinion. If ur goal is to graduate high school Bam! success!!! but y stop there create another goal and go get it. I think many of our youth think if their not making millions by age 25 then their a failure.

Parenting is at the top of the list for me as far as motivating our kids. Yeah im biased cuz i am a father but really "it takes a village...."you know the rest. We all need to be paragons for the youth to see that they is a future for black people. Especially if your young it would have more affect because of the age gap difference(less) they may feel like they can relate. I know everyone isnt built for college(i.e. don't wanna go,etc) but teach ur kids(and not just ur biological ones either) the value of education. Nah they don't have to go to college but damn get some post high school degree if just to enrich ur knowledge; feed the brain god.


Lastly i think we put up with too much crap from media and our own people. Pick ur battles though cuz u aint gonna win them all. For instance hell nah i don't let my daughter lissen to Beyonce not when she talking about upgrade u-what message is that for her? Things like dat u gotta be conscience of. Mi hija (daughter) was cheering in dowtown (?) NC and the music they were playing was not appropriate for lil gurls. Me and my Chica told them to change it. Some might say it is just music of the time maybe so but does that make it okay??? Hell 2 the nahhhh....!!!!


Look people wake yo azz up fuk smelling the coffee bust ur kids upside the head with a math book or instead of letting the watch their favorite show like Fairly Oddparents (shyt is hilarious by the way) take them to the museum and if u cant afford that do something for free that enriches their mind.